A state of mind
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
So Oct's finally here and in slightly more than 12 hours time, i'll be leaving on a jet plane.
Heres the itinerary :
12-17 ShenZhen
18-20 Macau
21-24 Hong Kong
I know i should be getting all excited but im actually feeling a little clouded.
A snapshot of whats happening recently :
1. Oct is exams month where there is minimal coaching, which means passable income too.
2. The parents blood test came in and both have high cholesterol, father's was very slightly over but over the suitable limit nonetheless, but mother's way off the chart, so high that if she went through the normal doctor's appointment, checkup, blood test yada yada... she'll be put on medication for life to control the condition. Im not really sure if i should feel glad that shes adequately covered, we've discovered it before anything drastic happened, or sad that she had high cholesterol in the first place.
There are things in life where no matter what you choose, it dosen really matter much like eating burger king instead of hokkien mee cos you get full eventually, or choose to spend 2 hrs watching the latest movie or reading a book because you just have 2 hours to spend, but
this is exactly the kind of life changing incident that change the whole game, just like hitting a TOTO, landing that investment banking job, get married to a princess, get crippled for life yada yada, u get the gist.
Imagine a monthly $70 medicine bill, you have to incorporate eating pills into your daily diet, you cant even leave the house with just your wallet because u need to at minimum take your pills out with you so you could have ur pills on time, your would cautiously refrain from oily food like kfc or fried food because you know you have high cholesterol. so many controls and rules to follow and if you dun, tadah CRITICAL ILLNESS like stroke, heart attack, cancer... now thats life changing.
All in all, I think the best way to explain my current state would be a lost sense of direction not trying to sound cliche it would be "on the path of becoming who i want to be, i became who i do not want to be"
whereby if i choose not to work tml, i'll still be able to garner an comfortable income, on the flip side if i am exceptionally hardworking tml, i am still not able accumulate enough to retire and live the high life.
Argh... the sandwich class.
At such times like this, I always look forward to Monday's and Thursday's evening time around 6ish 7pm, because there is always a life changing incident happening without fail, rain or shine, week in week out, that might just change my life completely.
posted by ikaira @ 1:00 AM,
