they say a picture says a thousand words. this one is worth a million.


caiying, u'll love me for this

posted by ikaira @ 7:31 PM, ,


this post is for those who always provide n provide

they nv need a reason to justify their actions,

they just do all the balancing act by themselves,

nv complain nor let you know of their difficulties or task.

you are always the the last to know, but ever wondered, why you onli know the good things n nv the bad things,

they too have thier dreams n ambitions, but you have taken the baton to furfil their uncarried task,

simply growing up bright n well is the best they can hope for,

but they nv discriminate upon your wrong doings,

they are the never falling pillar which you can always depend on,

but sooner or later, they will fall some day

before they fall, you know u must do something, but lack the courage, lack that initiative, lack the daringness,

lack the ability to push for a change, anticipate for a change, you are too used to the current situation, never wanting to make the first step, thats why things will nv change.

i wanna be a dad, not a father

posted by ikaira @ 2:29 AM, ,


getting sick n sick of doing things without passion.

without passion, there is no life.

there is no meaning.

wats the point of being there acting to be there.

wats all the reason behind all this.

just to proceed right. to move on n take the next step

aiyo aiyo, wat if theres nothign to look forward to.

nothing ever excites anymore.

colours turning duller every single day

till one day everything is one or two toned.

maybe that explains why im colourblind.

im too exciting for this world

posted by ikaira @ 5:58 AM, ,


looking at everyone's journey, it makes me wonder. everyone doing their own stuff, striving their own way out, complaining their own things.

some are still there, but some have already evaporated, we're all just a phone call away remember.

once, we used to see each n everyone at least twice a week, now its even hardly once per month. once, rules were nothing but meant to be broken, but now, although we still break them once or twice,we nv looked as free as before.
once, company was the only medicine to feel free, now each walking their own path.

is this realli called blending into society? we once grow together, walked together, do every single stupid thing with our innocence, without hiding, being critised, being coloured, but most importantly, being ourselves.

the saying goes, at least our paths once crossed. but during that once, it was one above one another or at least parallelled, now? each searching for its own self-proclaimed destination.

it was so hard yet so coincidental that we met along this line, this place, which forged huge memories.

all age n size, doing different things, but walking together.

we never questioned about the future, but now it seems like the latter had already designated a specific plan for each and everyone of us.

just like dragon balls, once the 7 balls are united, they burst out in seperate directions. maybe we're all fated to just meet once this lifetime.

omg, im turning 20.

i just wish i can skip this part, finding my own way, looking for directions in the big big jungle.

directly transmute me into the part where im alrady married, with kids, n ready to finish up the 2nd half of my life.

posted by ikaira @ 5:53 AM, ,


SAVAGE GARDEN - Santa Monica Lyrics

In Santa Monica, in the winter time,
The lazy streets so undemanding I walk into the crowd
In Santa Monica, you get your coffee from
The coolest places on the promenade
Where people dress just so
Beauty so unavoidable, everywhere you turn It's there
I sit and wonder what am I doing here?

But on the telephone line I am anyone
I am anything I want to be
I could be a super model or Norman Mailer
And you wouldn't know the difference Or would you?

In Santa Monica, all the people got modern names
Like Jake or Mandy And modern bodies too
In Santa Monica, on the boulevard,
You'll have to dodge those In-line skaters
Or they'll knock you down I never felt so lonely,
Never felt so out of place I never wanted something more than this

But on the telephone line I am anyone
I am anything I want to be
I could be a super model or Norman Mailer
And you wouldn't know the difference

On the telephone line, I am any height
I am any age I want to be
I could be a caped crusader, or space invader
And you wouldn't know the difference
Or would you?

But on the telephone line I am anyone
I am anything I want to be
I could be a super model or Norman Mailer
And you wouldn't know the difference

On the telephone line, I am any height I am any age
I want to be I could be a caped crusader, or space invader
And you wouldn't know the difference Or would you?

posted by ikaira @ 3:47 AM, ,


SAVAGE GARDEN - Santa Monica Lyrics

In Santa Monica, in the winter time,
The lazy streets so undemanding
I walk into the crowd
In Santa Monica, you get your coffee from
The coolest places on the promenade
Where people dress just so
Beauty so unavoidable, everywhere you turn
It's there I sit and wonder what am I doing here?

But on the telephone line I am anyone
I am anything I want to be
I could be a super model or Norman Mailer
And you wouldn't know the difference
Or would you?

In Santa Monica, all the people got modern names
Like Jake or Mandy
And modern bodies too
In Santa Monica, on the boulevard,
You'll have to dodge those
In-line skaters
Or they'll knock you down
I never felt so lonely,
Never felt so out of place
I never wanted something more than this

But on the telephone line I am anyone
I am anything I want to be
I could be a super model or Norman Mailer
And you wouldn't know the difference
On the telephone line, I am any height
I am any age I want to be
I could be a caped crusader, or space invader
And you wouldn't know the difference
Or would you?

But on the telephone line I am anyone
I am anything I want to be
I could be a super model or Norman Mailer
And you wouldn't know the difference
On the telephone line, I am any height
I am any age I want to be
I could be a caped crusader, or space invader
And you wouldn't know the difference
Or would you?

posted by ikaira @ 3:41 AM, ,


i need a life,
i need a getaway
but wonder if the getaway will recharge me
is it just a temporary high,
back into reality and in fact sinking deeper
is it realli me or its the world,
wonder how other ppl seem to be constantly happy,
or that i didnt see the backside of that happy face,
maybe below that mask, it ain so crystal?
wat about the flipside, underside and overside.
wheres all my battery gone to?
eatten by bugs, or dehydrated, or it didnt existed at all?
is following the flow correct?
why is everyone doing the same thing
do i have the same goal as them, y should i glide the wave
is it cos its easier,
needing to be accepted
or that i ain that courageous enough
to find my own mean of acceptance
have i found my piece of heaven
a heaven only achievable tru financial means
will these means ever be still the same upon achievement,
after a boy meets the world, will he still be a boy
i just wanna go home.
let me go home
im done
i gotta go home

posted by ikaira @ 4:53 AM, ,


if life was measured by ainstance, a moment, a 10 sec timeframe, when would u put it?

moment while exchanging wedding vows?
the cry of your first newborn?
the anouncement of u winning a 1 million toto ticket?

ppl tend to look back upon history to capture these moments, but wat if that 10sec lies in the future?

quote of the day

nv look back, it only brings you down to hell or too high above heaven.

posted by ikaira @ 4:35 AM, ,




I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way, to never let it get that far

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake, a smile, a laugh
Every day of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I watched you die
I heard you cry
Every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry
In the middle of the night
For the same damn thing

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I tried my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid

Because of you
Because of you

posted by ikaira @ 5:29 AM, ,


i need a leap of faith, but ain got enough guts to jump

i need to be caught, but ain got the guts to fall

i need to be heard, but ain got the guts to shout out loud

i need to let go, but ain got the guts to free myself

i need to find my path, but ain in the circumstances to control my choices

i need to find myself, but ain getting any nearer to my goal

i need to find my long term happiness, but got mesmerized by short flings of devil's play

posted by ikaira @ 12:58 AM, ,